I used to be very obsessed with the numbers. It started in high school. I was one of those kids you hated in math class who could carry the one (Dee you’d want to avoid me) and do fractions without a calculator.
I was the one the math teacher called on when no one else had the answer. He knew I did. Every time.
I sat in the front of the class so when I got my homework back, I could raise it high enough so those behind me could see my bright red “A.”
Yeah, I was that good with numbers.
So, when I started marketing online in 1998, I was obsessed with the numbers.
- I would run reports to see how many were clicking on my banner ads.
- I would view my web statistics every day to see if there was a bump in the numbers.
- I would login to my Ultimate Bulletin Board (remember that) to see if any new members signed up.
Then, social media came around and my obsession became a super obsession (no, that’s not a typo). I was in it to win it. I was competing with others to see how quickly I could get my 1,000th follower on Twitter. Or my 15th friend on Facebook. Or my 2-millionith connection on LinkedIn.
I Only Cared About How Much I Scored
When I was in university, I played 2-years of varsity basketball. At the time, I was dating this ultra-competitive guy. He too played basketball, but at the college level (in Canada, there’s a BIG difference between university and college – there’s a Wikipedia entry that explains it all).
Despite the fact that we would never, ever play on the same team due to our different genders (if you didn’t get it – I’m a gal, he’s a guy) and different collegiate playing levels, he always wanted to know what I scored after each game and how many minutes I played.
My coach liked to huddle with the team after the game ended. We would shake our opponents’ hands, tell them that it was a good game, then meet our coach at the end of the bench for a post game pep talk.
Instead of running to the huddle, I would boot over to the scorer’s table to review my points scored and the minutes played so I could stuff those hefty numbers down my (ex) boyfriend’s throat.
After doing this several times, my coach beat me to the scorer’s table after one game, removed the scorer’s sheet and promised to bench me the rest of the season if I ever checked my points before huddling with the team.
So, I stopped looking at the numbers.
And shortly thereafter, I broke up with my ultra competitive, shallow, insecure boyfriend.
But, I digress…
Just like my points scored in each basketball game, the numbers made me feel really good. Just like now. When I meet people in real life, it feels dang good when they exclaim in complete astonishment:
“Wow! You have 12,000 followers on Twitter? How the heck do you keep up?”
“Tweetdeck,” I would reply. To which I would scamper away fearing I would have to explain what Tweetdeck is in layman terms (shudder the thought).
But now, I don’t care.
Because whether 12,000 people follow me on Twitter or just 1 all I care about is making sure that the voice I proclaim in the marketplace is heard by those who should take notice and listen.
You, a Podcasting Expert?
I remember a couple years ago, someone on a podcasting listserv (is this what they’re still called?) questioned why anyone would call me the First Lady of Podcasting.
This podcasting listserv was full of hobbyists (probably still is), in other words, the membership on this listserv consists of those who could care less whether they made moneyfrom their podcast. Some on the list said they never heard of me.
Except three.
All men and all who fall within my target market. Their voices were the only ones that mattered.
Sure, it stung to be mocked on a listserv for 4-days. Snide comments from those who felt good squashing my expertise to boost their egos.
But only 3 voices mattered. Those were the ones in my target market.
Even If Your Message Is Relevant, It Won’t Matter to the Wrong People
Right now, I’m promoting the 2010 Social Media Telesummit. It’s an annual virtual event I host every January. Within my email list of 5000 emails, I have a sublist of 700 people who opted in to hear more about social media and the telesummit.
So, you have to get this – the people on the sublist are those who opted to hear more about my social media products and the telesummit.
Let me spell it out again – these people gave me their permission to bug them about the 2010 Social Media Telesummit.
Got it?
Good.
Now get this – the social media sub-list has the highest number of unsubscribes compared to any other sub-list within my database.
I find this fascinatingly ironic.
I don’t send this sub-list an abnormal number of emails. Maybe once a week. It goes up to three times a week if there’s a special campaign, like right now. I send 3 emails a week regarding the 2010 Social Media Telesummit.
Three.
To a sub-list of people who gave me permission to bug them about the upcoming telesummit.
I think in the history of this social media sub-list, I’ve had 1500 subscribes. Now, less than half remain in 12-months. And I’m not sending them irrelevant information. They opted to learn more about social media and the upcoming telesummit.
THEY TOLD ME THAT IT’S OKAY TO TELL THEM ABOUT THE SOCIAL MEDIA TELESUMMIT.
Sorry for yelling, but I just needed to point this out.
This sub-list has the highest number of unsubscribes compared to all my other sub-lists.
So, what does this tell me?
It tells me that even though my message is relevant, because I’m not talking to the right people, my efforts are wasted. That I could be likable and I could have relevant information, but if I’m talking to the wrong people, they’ll leave.
And that’s why to me the numbers no longer matter.
I could have a kazillion people on my Twitter follow list, but if I’m replacing that list every 90-days due to unfollows, then do I really have a profitable list?
Platform + Inaction = Flat Out Broke
Platform without action results in unprofitibility. For example, I was at an event recently where the host bartered services with a social media expert (not me). He wanted the expert to build his Twitter list to 10,000 followers in exchange for a seat to his event. You see, the social media expert has over 50,000 followers (again, not me) and the event host knew that the social media expert could help him reach his goal.
Well, the social media expert built this event host’s follow list to 15,000 followers. And guess what? She couldn’t afford the plane ticket to get to his event.
This social media expert has platform, but her connections don’t take action. Thus, she’s broke. Not a good combination at all.
Unfollow, Unfriend, Unconnect, Unsubscribe, I So Uncare
My friend, Scott Stratten, who recently inked a book deal with Wiley (yay!) is writing a book called Unmarketing: Stop Marketing. Start Engaging. Scott was a faculty member at my 2009 Social Media Telesummit and is a wonderful unmarketer.
I also call him the Chef Ramsay of Twitter because he’s so grumpy. Always cooking up trouble with someone on Twitter. But Scott is way cuter than the Chef. And Scott’s Canadian, so it means he’s really oh so lovable.
But, I digress again…
Take a look again at the sub-title of Scott’s book & blog – Stop Marketing. Start Engaging.
- Start engaging by treating everyone like a person instead of a number.
- Start engaging by caring about people’s issues instead of lumping them into your psycho-demographic.
- Start engaging by asking Susie about her cat. Or Peter about his mom. Or Janice about her new log cabin.
(Scott, I just wrote the coles notes to your book)
I started doing that last year and my business is better because of it.
- I call customers who purchase my products and services to thank them. Yes, each one.
- I send handwritten cards out to customers who complete my coaching programs. Yes, each one. Even those who requested refunds. And I handwrite them. Not my assistant. Nor some company who stores my handwritten fonts in some database so my assistant can type it in my “handwriting.” No way! Just like Martha Stewart when she let someone go on her one season Apprentice, I write each card one-by-one.
The small touches that help me show my target market that they’re important to me. Each individual person.
So, whether you unsubscribe or unfollow me, I really could care less. Social media is no longer a basketball game where I count points and numbers. It’s the huddle with a small, core group where I know each by name and by face.
Game on.
(BTW, I’m providing sneak peeks of the 2010 Social Media Telesummit through my preview call series. You can sign up for them on the front page.)
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Excellent article, Leesa. It's so easy to get caught up in the wrong numbers (followers vs. profitability). I had to learn not to take it personally when people unsubscribe. If they are leaving it is because they aren't a good fit. Simple.
Love this article–great reminder. Thanks for sharing it, Leesa!
Kudos to you Leesa! I truly get it. As newbies, we get so caught up in the hype. We hurriedly race to get as many followers, friends, etc. as we can because we're told that this is the quickest, easiest way to build our list. Well, thank goodness I didn't get caught up in all this for I would surely join the millions who get discouraged and give up. I see that the value is in the quality of your connections, not the quantity. Taking care of your clients is so important and it's the extra efforts, such as personally calling your client or sending a handwritten thank you note that guarantees a customer for life. Thanks Leesa for sharing your insight.
Kudos to you Leesa. I truly get it. I think as newbies, we get caught up in getting as many followers or friends, etc. but when it all boils down to it, you are right, it REALLY doesn't matter. The value is in the quality not quantity. Thanks again Leesa.
Leesa:
I liked you last year when you had the chutzpah to stand up to the ****camp community and their sometimes snotty manners.
Funny thing about engagement and numbers at first I didn't want to be rude to listeners of the radio show by not following them back…my original thoughts were if they valued listening to me who was I to say they were unimportant and two I wanted to know what they were thinking and what was important to them, so I listened.
I too find it funny that those who wanted to be on my list were the ones who acted like I was spamming them by telling me in their unsubscribes I was sending too many emails, ROFLAO one time I has not sent an email to them in two weeks, give me a frickin break right!
I think it is high time to call people on their lies. They are just too lazy and undisciplined to say I have changed my mind or I do not care for your style, instead they say “You send too many emails” because they are weak and that's the easy way out.
Thanks for saying the hard thing and giving me a place to voice my thoughts as well.
I have always loved the personal touch, learned it from my Grandmother. The other thing it reminds me of is when you care for someone and their own insecurities rise from their unacknowledged awareness in their inability to believe they deserve, so instead they come up with excuses of why you are “too much” for them hahahha.
You rock gal keep it up I love your bravery.
Oooooh, don't get me started. I had someone open a ticket on my help desk
EVERY TIME my team sent out our weekly ezine to tell me I was sending out
too many emails. EVERY WEEK. When we invited her to unsubscribe from the
list, she said that it was okay, but that I shouldn't send out so many
emails since it's disruptive.
I was at an event recently where a woman went into hysterics telling the
event host that she didn't want to send out an ezine to tell her subscribers
about her programs and services. She also shared that she didn't unsubscribe
from anyone's lists – even though she really wanted to get off them –
because she didn't want to make them mad.
I'm not sure why this is such an issue for some people. If I don't want to
be on someone's list, I hit the cancel button and I'm off. If I get a page
where they ask why I'm unsubscribing, I state why which is usually that my
interests changed. It's simply THAT easy. It is.
Just have to confirm the fact that Leesa sends out handwritten cards, even for refunds and I was VERY impressed by that. (She refunded because a workshop had to be cancelled, not because I didn't like a product.)
Love the easy bottom line – engaging with people who want to engage with you and not playing the numbers game!! I have been receiving your emails for over a year now and just started really getting my head around social media – still listening, still learning but taking the action now!
Have listened to your interviews, gone off and read great success stories about Fabian Hendrickson and Jennifer Fong which have been so inspiring. Thank you for caring and sharing.
Leesa, what a great article! I have only a few followers on Twitter because I look at everyone who follows me, check their website, and decide if it is someone I want to learn from, engage with, or hopefully do business with. I'm not going to worry about whether I need numbers now. Thanks for a great post. Looking forward to Social Media Telesummit 2010.
That sound you hear is a great sigh of relief eminating from my office after reading this article and promptly deleting todays stats! Thanks for the humor and the wisdom and for leading by example. Great article, Leesa!
I needed that thanks, since starting my own youtube channel I've bin obsessively checking my video hits and subscribers. I'm gonna stop all that nonsense now… I think the very act of being willing to let people go will actually bring more to you, more of the rite ones of course.
It goes back to the old “quality over quantity” thing… and you clearly get that concept as evidenced by your personal touches! Thanks for putting this out there. I've been bombarded the past week or so w/offers of how to get a bazillion followers, including from a good friend. It all just clutters up Twitter and my inbox – and is promptly deleted and/or ignored 🙂
Lori
Loved this article–another great window into your approach and life. I'm still mastering the “sting” of unsubscribes as I grow my list and visibility. I appreciate your pulling back the curtain. I've noticed one thing: I often send personal emails when people unsubscribe with a “reason.” I get amazingly positive responses. My favorite situation is to send good wishes when someone unsubscribes in order to “take in less info/advice/expertise and get closer to their own voice, writing, approach.” This is especially valid as I consult and coach in the publishing and strategy sphere. Thx–and hope we connect soon virtually or IRL.
Absolutely Leesa, on the personal side, if someone isn't someone I care about they can come or go as they please. On the business side I have built my contacts to reflect my target demographics. Age, geographical location, and/or lifestyle.
On Facebook I only conduct business from one of my business pages. I only use Twitter for business, although I do try to engage with my followers and am cautious about the number of links I post.
Keep up the great work…Lloyd
Spot on Leesa. Ya know, I came to that realization not too long ago as well and I have a post that is a perfect tie-in to the point you made: http://taylormarek.com/2009/12/28/thought-leaders/ Enjoy! (Oh, and btw you are on that list) 😉
This is a very important message. It's not about numbers, it's about the relationships you cultivate with your followers. I am also a big believer in the handwritten note. Everytime I do it, the effect is palpable.
Leesa,
I really enjoy your style. You've long been a favorite of mine and you continue to deliver meaningful and relevant content. Thanks for contributing!
Thanks for popping by and stroking my ego. You're welcomed here anytime, Doug 🙂
You made me laugh and made me think, and I thank-you for both.
I remember making a woman cry once. It was during a Toastmasters' meeting. I was chairing it. I asked her to stand and introduce herself. She stood and fled the room in tears.
But you're the first who I made laugh and think at the same time. And you're welcome for both 😉
Atta girl 🙂
Thanks for the props my awesome friend and supporter. Always smile to see you morph into who you really are: an ass-kicken, big hearted, business doin machine
**sniff sniff** I owe 20% of what I know to the University of Unmarketing. Now, to follow up this post with another that's just as clever. How do you stay interesting blog post after blog post? Share your wisdom with me oh wise one.
It's so fascinating to me to see the “coaching world” talk about what the “Realtors world” has known for awhile. The personal touch is the best way to earn referrals for life.
Excellent article! Including the digressions.
Lisa
Let's just hope the Coaching world doesn't catch on to the realtors version of “personal touch to be awkward at networking events with their picture on cards
LOL. I've seen plenty of biz cards with pics on them. Two camps: 1) says it's a good way to remember who the card is from, 2) noooooooooooooooooooo.
Yeah, like, who knew? But let's not make the touch too personal. I might have to fight somebody…
Sweet! You always did have heart!!
For so long, I operated from a heartless place. Then I bought one on ebay and it has changed my life.
Naw, just playing. I will say that it feels quite refreshing to say what's on my mind without hiding behind flowery language. I feel so utterly refreshed.
Wow! I loooove the way you tied in basketball with social media. I try not to worry too much about the numbers, but you mentioning the huddle is what really opened my eyes. You've got an awesome personal touch and I think I'm going to make that part of my business too!
Thanks so much!
I'm not sure why this post reminded me of my basketball days, but when I started mentioning my obsession with numbers, this memory jumped into my head.
Yeah, it's all about the huddle. Not everyone can be part of it and not everyone should be. The fans, the opponents, the referees are not invited to the huddle that the team is having with their coach.
So, if we all think of the basketball huddle as an intimate gathering between a small group of like minded people, many of us will be able to improve our businesses with just that one change.
Great article. You rock! It's about connecting with those that are in your target. Such a simple concept. Yet not really thought about.
I'd rather have 4 customers that pay me regularly and like my work (and recommend me), than have 15 customers who may use me once in a blue moon and then complain that I'm charging them too much.
Agreed. And that's my point. I have a handful of really awesome clients that
I work with who never complain about my prices and give me feedback – both
good and bad – out of complete love and respect. I'd rather have them in my
corner any day, then thousands of people who never ever respond to me.