I just returned from attending a Wealth Builders information session. I sat down and got up in record, not because of the content (I only heard about 3-minutes), but because of the attitude of one of staff members.

I didn’t plan to attend, but my mother insisted that I go on her behalf. After finishing up a call with one of my colleagues, I noticed that I had just 15-minutes to get to the event.

Hunger dictated my next move, so I stopped off at a restaurant to pick up an order of poutine. I purposely chose it because it’s quiet (no wrappers), scent-free and there’s a good chance that I can keep it under control while juggling a pen and paper.

I got to the hotel, signed in, then was asked to sit down in the “green area” to wait to be seated in the main room. About 30-seconds go by and a woman stood in front of me and asked me to follow her.

Before she took me into the room, we stopped in the hallway so she could tell me the purpose of today’s event. Her first words to me were:

“You’re late and you already missed the DVD that we showed.”

At this point, I didn’t even know her name. My first reaction was “who cares?” Instead, I said:

“Well, there’s another 90-minutes to go in the presentation, so I’ll be able to catch a good portion of the session, right?”

My optimism seemed to be bothering her because she decided to attack me another way (I’m trying not to be biased here, but it’s my story and from my perspective). She took notice of the covered container in my hands containing the poutine and said:

“We don’t allow food inside because it’s not that type of event. You can eat it out here and I’ll take you inside once you’re finished.”

I sighed. I was late and didn’t want to miss any more, but I agreed that I would stay in the hallway with my food.

She explained a few things to me about how the rest of the afternoon would go and then walked me inside the room. That’s when she turned and said to me:

“I’ll seat you towards the back so that the smells from your food don’t bother anyone else.”

Oh brother.

I was utterly and completely confused at this point. The poutine container was covered – tightly. Plus, I thought food was not allowed inside the room, so why was she escorting me in?

I sat down, put my notebook on the floor and tried to gather myself so I wouldn’t drop my poutine. I was impressed that there was a woman on stage (don’t see that alot) and only heard her say “We’re looking to put these vending machines in offices with 10-75 employees,” when the woman who greeted me (and I use that term lightly) said:

“You’re going to have to leave and eat your food in the hallway as I don’t want it to disturb others.”

Really?

I looked at her in complete disbelief. I was seated so far away from anyone I couldn’t believe for a minute that I was disturbing anyone. Plus, the container was sealed tightly, so I was puzzled as to what smells she was referring to.

I had enough of her negative energy and the constant nitpicking about a tightly sealed container that I still hadn’t opened. So, I said:

“I’m leaving.”

And walked out the door and came home.

As I reflect on this experience, there is one thing the woman did not do that would’ve alleviated her own stress.

Now, she was rude to me. Her customer service skills needs ALOT of work, especially given that I’m the prospect with the potential to buy. But, her rudeness isn’t the problem.

The problem is that she operated out of integrity by not respecting her own boundaries.

She first told me that food wasn’t allowed inside the room whether I was consuming it or not. But then, she took me inside. She contradicted herself.

She approached me one more time either because she was really bothered I was sitting in the room with food or because one of her colleagues reminded her and she needed to quickly correct her mistake.

Whatever the reason, by dishonoring her own boundaries, she couldn’t get upset at me for not honoring them as well.

In your business, you have to respect your own boundaries. If you don’t, you can’t get mad at people who do not. For example:

• If you provide coaching and you normally don’t discount, don’t do it just because you have a new client and you’re desparate for money. If you negotiate your rate for this client, he or she will feel that everything is negotiable in your business. You have not respected your money boundaries, so don’t expect the client to do so either EVER.
• If you normally tell people on Twitter or Facebook that all support issues must go through your help desk or through a specific email, don’t start answering support issues just because you have the solution at your fingertips. If you don’t respect your own customer service process (the boundary), neither will your customers.
• If you don’t do speaking gigs on weekends, don’t start just because your favorite colleague, friend, or client asked you to. You will feel resentful that you can’t attend your daughter’s piano recital and this energy will come out during your presentation. If you don’t respect your own time boundaries, neither will your friends or colleagues.